♥ Queen of all Grumpy Old Farts ♥

About the GrumpyQueen

A.K.A Gatekeeper

I love food, don't deprive me of it.

I'm not Princess, I'm Queen

I can be quite grumpy and when I am, I hide here, my dungeon for reflections, ramblings and ranting.

Whatever I write are opinions, and may not be the whole truth. Do not read it like the Gospel.

I hate as vehemently as I love
I already know I'm crazy, be my friend, it's safer

Different is not bad, just not the same as the rest

If you don't like me, it's probably mutual
But I'm nice, really :p

Blog started 21st June 2007, shifted from www.thegatekeeperstory.blogspot.com

If you wanna be linked, just tag ok?

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Please use my haloscan to comment on specific posts by clicking on the
"Speak your mind"
link at the end of each post.

For misc/random comments just tag on the latest post.

I'm just too sick and tired of a tagboard with a short term memory.

Thanks! :)

History

December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
May 2010
June 2010
September 2010
October 2010

It's easier for you to walk away, than it is for you to reach out to me.
It's easier for you to look away, than it is for you to see the depth of my despair.
It's easier for you to look through me, than it is for you to see "me."
It's easier for you to distance yourself, than it is for you to really care.
It's easier for you to hear, than it is for you to listen.
It's easier for you to judge, than it is for you to understand.
It's easier for you to label, than it is to get acquainted.
It's easier for you to bask in your joy, than it is for you to feel my pain.
It's easier for you to bewilder at my mysteries, than it is for you to probe deeply into the depths of my soul.

It's easier for me to look away, than it is to let you see the feelings betrayed through my eyes.
It's easier for me to cry, than it is for me to talk.
It's easier for me to walk alone, than it is to risk rejection.
It's easier for me to push you away, than it is for me to be held.
It's easier for me to distance myself, than it is to trust that you won´t hurt me.
It's easier for me to die, than it is for me to face life's challenges.

It's hard for me to smile when I am hurting.
It's hard for me to talk when you won't understand.
It's hard for me to reach out when I need help the most.

If only you'd really look at me and see who I am.
If only you cared enough to reach out when I push you away.
If only you'd hold me, without asking why.
If only you'd acknowledge the validity of my feelings.

But it's the easy roads that are most often taken.
And so I hurt alone.

--Jo A. Witt

10.10.10 1:30 AM

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Practical aim

After great pain, what would the body
learn that it does not already know of relief?

When that fire-truck has raged past,
what do I rediscover about silence
except that I would always miss it?

Do trees mind if it is the same wind
that passes through their heads everyday?

After the mall is completed, must we
remember the field it now inhabits
where we raced each other as children?

If my lover forgets to wake me with a kiss
a second time this week, should I worry?

Does solitude offer strength over time, or
is denial of it the only practical aim?

After the earthquake, would it matter
if no one saw two dogs from different
families approaching each other
without suspicion, then moving apart?

As the workers wash their faces hidden
by helmets that beam back the sun,
should they care about the new building
behind them beyond a fear of it falling?

If my mother cannot see how else to be
happy, is it enough that she may lie
in bed, convinced God watches her sleep?

After deep loss, what does the heart
learn that it has not already understood
about regret?

When all light finally forsakes a room,
do we take the time to interrogate the dark,
and to what end?

Cyril Wong (Copyright 2006)

28.9.10 10:19 PM

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Fucking spoilt brat

Chao cheebye I just got kicked and punched by a spoilt brat who has the nerve to throw the first punch even after we've given her so much face, spent like 4 hours coaxing her, trying to calm her down..

Finally she did and managed to open up. Than for some reason or another, the retard started wailing for her mummy again.

I would have understood if the bitch was doing all of these because she's psychotic..but she's not! She's just some stupid attention seeking brat who can't behave. This kinda of people don't need meds, they just need 2 tight slaps every now and then.

Can't she fucking understand simple english? Her mum has been there almost 24/7, taking all her shit, on a verge of a breakdown and she still selfishly hogs on to her mum, not allowing her to go home and get some proper sleep..

I've really had enough of such shit. I can take the most psychotic people and their nonsense. These people don't mean it, they're unwell. But to take this spoilt brat's nonsense, I really need to be God.

6.6.10 4:11 PM

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I think the problem with the internet is this...that people think a medical degree can be earned by reading some internet articles. If it were so, the government don't need to spend so much money to train doctors and nurses. Buy them a laptop, fix it up to the internet, ask them to stay at home and read internet articles for 5 years than give them a degree can already.
The trouble with people is not that they don't know but that they know so much that ain't so. -Josh Billings-
Never fails to piss me off. When ignorant people give me the know-it-all attitude, when they know nuts about what's going on and still got the cheek to order me around.
When you try to explain to them nicely, they give you that fucked up face because they think they're so bloody smart and you're just a fool in their eyes.

17.5.10 2:11 PM

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I'm back to blogging. Today my sis told me sth which pissed me off, thank God I wasn't there..

She said some people told her that the mentally ill are a waste of resources and deserve to die. What pissed me off further is that person even said they do not deserve pity because they don't even know that they're behaving abnormally.

I'm just shocked that such stupid people exist. Even a pig would know, why is it that mental patient's fault he's got a mental problem? Does that mean a diabetic patient deserves to die? Since they can't produce enough insulin, the excess sugar is going to be excreted out in the urine..So they should die because they're wasting sugar?

If you haven't seen how much suffering a mental patient and his/her family would go through, I suggest you just shut that fucking mouth of yours and stop acting smart.

2.5.10 9:15 PM

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